


don't fight it, baby, be sweet

by karcathy



Series: somebody oughta lay you out [2]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fluff and Smut, Fluff and Smut and Banter, Light D/s Dynamics, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, almost non-existent really i got derailed into them being cute, bratty annoying phil!!!, bratty phil, this was supposed to be kinkier but they're just too sweet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-27
Updated: 2019-11-27
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:33:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21586174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/karcathy/pseuds/karcathy
Summary: It started out small. It always did. With Phil, feeling restless and annoying, and Dan, distracted and busy. Dan was working, supposedly, although the document he had open was blank, while Phil lounged on the couch next to him, ostensibly watching the telly. In reality, he was trying to distract Dan. It was completely without subtlety, by this point, but he still enjoyed the game of it. A little stretch here, a brush against his thigh there. Nothing unusual, all just gently pushing at his patience until something had to give.
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Series: somebody oughta lay you out [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1617373
Comments: 8
Kudos: 57





	don't fight it, baby, be sweet

Dan was slouched against the arm of the sofa, his laptop balanced precariously on one thigh. Phil was leaning against him, his eyes on the T.V. but his attention on Dan. It was an awkward position, thanks mostly to Dan’s inability to sit normally, but he tried to make it work. Yawning and stretching, Phil twisted around, his head falling into Dan’s lap. He jostled Dan’s arm as he moved, making him swear softly. 

“Don’t you have anything better to do?” he asked, looking down at Phil with an expression of fond exasperation. 

“Not really,” Phil said, with an impish smile. “I’m trying to work, you know,” he said, lifting his laptop away with one hand and gently shoving at Phil’s shoulder. 

“But I’m _bored_ ,” Phil said, dragging the word out petulantly and pouting exaggeratedly. 

“Then find something else to do,” Dan said with a sigh. “Stop pestering me.”

“Make me,” said Phil, waggling his eyebrows. 

Dan groaned. He tried to go back to his laptop, but Phil had robbed him of a surface to put it on. Sighing, he closed the lid and put it to one side. 

“Fine,” he said, trying to look annoyed. “You have my undivided attention.”

Phil grinned. “Good,” he said, pushing himself up and attempting to kiss the tip of Dan’s nose. He missed, hitting his cheek instead. Dan laughed, then swore as the hand Phil used to support himself went squarely into his crotch. 

“Dickhead,” he said, bringing one leg up to kick Phil in the ribs. The angle meant it was more of a gentle poke. 

“Ow,” Phil said, giggling, his hands all over Dan as he tried to regain his balance. 

“Shut up, that didn’t hurt,” said Dan. 

“Yes it did!” Phil tried to give him a kicked-puppy look, but it was slightly ruined by the fact he was trying not to laugh. 

“You’re so annoying,” Dan said, but he couldn’t keep himself from smiling. 

“I know,” Phil said, sounding smug. 

He leaned into Dan again, pressing his lips against his neck. Dan let out a soft sigh that turned to a yelp as Phil dug his teeth in. 

“You dick,” he said, thumping Phil’s shoulder with a loose fist. “Can’t you just be nice?”

“Hmm,” Phil said, winding a curl of Dan’s hair around his finger, then tugging at it just slightly too hard. “No.”

Dan snorted. His gaze drifted around the room for a moment, before settling on Phil. A cogwheel started to turn in his brain, and he smiled slowly. Phil was smiling as well, a cheeky expression on his face. 

“Okay,” he said, one hand moving to cup Phil’s cheek. “You want me to make you, right?”

Phil nodded, his hair brushing lightly against the tips of Dan’s fingers. He leant forward eagerly, but Dan tightened his grip slightly, holding him in place. 

“What do you want?” he asked, his other hand coming up to rest gently against Phil’s cheek, holding his face still. 

Phil stayed quiet for a long moment, clearly struggling to put his desires into words. Dan watched him for a moment, then sighed. Releasing his grip, he turned away, reaching for his laptop again. 

“ _Da-an_ ,” Phil whined, stretching his name out into two syllables. 

“Yes?” Dan said, giving him a challenging look. 

“C’mon, make this easy for me.”

“You have to _tell me_ what you want,” Dan said, rolling his eyes. “I’m not a mind reader.”

“Wish you were,” Phil grumbled, picking up Dan’s hand and lacing their fingers together. “I don’t know, I’m not sure what I want.”

“Helpful,” Dan said, looking at their intertwined hands. 

“Look,” Phil said, giving him an earnest look. “I want you to tell me. But, like, I want you to _make_ me.”

“Right. And you don’t want me to tell you to leave me alone, right?” Dan couldn’t stop himself from laughing at the pouting look Phil gave him. “Fine,” he said, standing up and tugging Phil with him. “You’re so annoying.” He pulled Phil in for a kiss, letting it linger for a moment, then pulled back, holding his head still between his hands. Phil strained against his grip, whining softly, and Dan smiled. 

“What’s the safe word today?” he asked, carefully holding Phil’s face, close enough to his that he couldn’t really focus his gaze. 

“Uh,” Phil paused, his tongue darting out to lick his lips. “Um. Bubble?”

“Bubble?” Dan said, snorting. “Sure, okay.”

“Shut up, it was the first word I thought of.”

Dan had to kiss him, his soft pout giving way easily to Dan’s lips. 

“Come on,” he said, letting go and stepping back. Phil stood still, not moving until Dan took his hand and tugged him towards the bedroom. He didn’t resist, but he did stumble over his own feet, making himself laugh. Dan just rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t help smiling. At the doorway, he pulled Phil in for another kiss, slightly clumsy. Phil’s teeth caught his lip, the metallic taste of blood hitting before the pain did, making him hiss. 

“Ow, you dick,” he said, softly into the space between them, pressing another quick kiss to the corner of Phil’s mouth before pulling away. He wiped his lip with his thumb, checking the damage. It looked like the bleeding had already stopped. Satisfied, he kissed Phil again, trying to push him towards the bed. To his credit, it was less like Phil was resisting and more like he’d gotten confused, their legs colliding until they had to collapse into a pile of flailing limbs on the floor. 

“Ow,” Phil said, bringing his hand up to the back of his head. 

“Are you hurt?” Dan asked, pushing himself up and trying to get a look. 

“Yes, I’m dying,” Phil said, ducking his head forwards, letting Dan examine his skull. 

Dan ran his hand across it, parting the soft hair to search for a wound. “You’re fine, idiot,” he said, bringing his hand around to tip Phil’s chin up. He kissed him slowly, softly, then pulled back, letting Phil chase him. He turned away as Phil tried to kiss him again, letting his lips land on the edge of his jaw, then let out a soft sound as Phil kissed his neck instead. His moan turned to a hiss as Phil dug his teeth in sharply. 

“Stop biting me, you animal,” he said, pushing Phil back into the floor and moving to straddle his waist. 

“Make me,” Phil said, sticking his tongue out at Dan. 

He tried to push up against him, but Dan grabbed his arms, pushing them flat against the floor above his head, effectively trapping him. Phil pushed against him slightly, but relaxed when Dan leaned down to kiss him. The peace didn’t last for long; Phil started pushing against him, pushing for more. Dan pushed back, holding him in place, making him wait. It worked for a bit, but eventually Phil had to play dirty, waiting until Dan slackened his grip to pull his arms free and run them up his sides, seeking his most ticklish points. Dan shrieked, wrapping his arms around himself protectively as he pulled back. 

“Fuck you,” he said, backing up against the dresser and flipping Phil off. 

Phil giggled, flopping lazily back onto the floor. 

“I hate you,” Dan said. 

“Yeah?” Phil said, smirking up at him. 

“Yeah,” Dan said, without any heat. 

“Come on, punish me,” Phil said, giving him a look that was still more pouting than seductive. “It’s what I deserve.”

“What you want, more like,” Dan grumbled, crawling across to Phil. “Brat.” 

“Teach me a lesson.” Phil grinned at him, wide and teasing. 

“Should just leave you here,” Dan said, pressing little kisses to his face. “That’d teach you.”

“Aw,” Phil said, kissing him back. “Don’t do that.”

“Hmm,” Dan said, talking between kisses. “I might.”

“I’ll be good.” 

“No, you won’t.”

Phil laughed. “No, I won’t,” he agreed, moving to nibble at Dan’s shoulder. Dan swatted his elbow, pushing him onto his back again. 

“Annoying,” he muttered, pinning Phil’s arms. 

Phil just smiled into their kiss, giggling as Dan moved to his neck. “We have a bed, you know,” he pointed out, craning his neck to look at it. 

“It’s your fault we’re on the floor,” Dan said, drawing Phil’s hands down to his side. 

“Yeah, I’m regretting that,” Phil said, wriggling but not resisting as Dan used his knees to pin his arms to his sides. 

“Tough.” Dan used his newly freed hands to cradle Phil’s face, tilting it back towards him for another kiss. Phil tried to chase him as he pulled away, but he was pretty well trapped under Dan’s weight. He just had to stay there, pouting, as Dan sat up and pulled off his T-shirt. He had to drop back down, grabbing Phil’s arms as he tried to free them. 

“Oh, no, no,” he said, tutting at Phil. “No way.”

“Aw,” Phil said, still trying to wiggle free. “I’m not gonna tickle you.” 

“Liar,” Dan said, laughing. “You absolutely will.”

“I won’t!” Phil protested, clearly trying to sound innocent. That act hadn’t worked on Dan in a long time. 

“Hmm,” he said, raising an eyebrow. He stared at Phil for a long moment, before smiling and leaning down to kiss him. “You will.” Phil’s breath huffed against his cheek, a quiet laugh. 

Phil continued trying to free his arms as Dan kissed his neck, starting work on a love bite. Phil protested, mumbling about not leaving a mark, but Dan ignored him. Eventually, Phil managed to free one arm, bringing it up and running it lightly over Dan’s waist in a way that tickled worse than before. Swearing softly, Dan swatted at his hand, knocking it away from him.

“Dick,” he said. Phil laughed. 

“No, you,” he said, resting both of his hands on Dan’s waist, firmly enough not to tickle. 

Dan sighed, his breath huffing against Phil’s neck, making him shiver as it hit the damp patch he’d been working at. Shuffling backwards, he pushed Phil’s shirt up, bunching it under his armpits as he moved onto his chest, pressing kisses in a trail down to his stomach. Phil tangled his fingers in Dan’s hair, gripping and tugging in a way that was just the right side of painful. Dan followed the trail of hair down to his waistband, his fingers fumbling with the button, part teasing and part clumsiness. Phil lifted his hips impatiently, hindering rather than helping Dan as he unzipped his jeans and tugged them down his thighs. He smiled a little at Phil’s pants - a garish Christmas pattern, in November? It was ridiculous, and adorable, and so _Phil_. Dan hated that he loved it. 

“Really?” he said, looking up at Phil with raised eyebrows.

“It’s nearly Christmas,” Phil said defensively. “And they’re cute.”

They were kind of cute, to be fair, even though Dan didn’t think llamas had much to do with Christmas. Dan just rolled his eyes, sliding the pants down as well. He was taking his time now, enjoying the view. He liked that he got to see this, and no one else did. Phil was already whining impatiently, his fingers tugging at Dan’s hair, but he took his time, moving to nuzzle the skin at the top of his thigh, feeling the hair - coarse, but soft - against his cheek. With a soft huff, he moved to the base of Phil’s cock, letting his breath ghost against the skin until Phil realised that pulling his hair wasn’t getting him anywhere. 

“C’mon, Dan,” he complained. He tried to buck his hips up, but Dan had gotten a good grip on him now. He could feel Phil’s pulse thrumming steadily under his thumbs. 

“Patience,” Dan tutted. 

He paused, took a deep breath, then took his whole cock, still soft, in his mouth. He moaned softly, half a performance - he knew how good he looked with a cock in his mouth - and was gratified by a soft groan from Phil, his fingers tensing against his skull. Dan was good at this; it didn’t take him long to get Phil hard and pushing him desperately for more. His fingers tightened in Dan’s hair as he pulled back, an obscene trail of saliva hanging between his lower lip and the tip of Phil’s cock for a moment before it snapped and splashed. 

“Fuck, Dan, don’t stop,” Phil said, lifting his head to look at Dan through half-open eyes. They were unfairly beautiful, blown-out pupils against bright blue-green irises. 

“I’ll do what I want,” Dan said, smirking up at him. 

Phil groaned, his head flopping back against the floor, then winced. 

“Stupid,” Dan said, fondly. 

“Shut up,” said Phil, his fingers massaging small circles into Dan’s scalp. “Suck my dick.”

“So crass,” Dan said, sitting up and holding one hand to his chest in a exaggerated gesture of mock-offence. 

“Da _-an_ ,” Phil whined. 

“Shh,” Dan said, standing up and moving around the bed. He had to stifle a giggle as he glanced back at Phil, looking ridiculous with his clothes rucked up and his dick out. Ridiculous, but ridiculously hot, as well. “Get your clothes off, stupid.”

“Why?” Dan wasn’t looking at Phil, but he could hear the pout. 

“Well, if you want me to fuck you awkwardly on the floor,” Dan said, rummaging through the bedside drawer, “I guess we can try, but I’m honestly over that.” 

Phil huffed, but there were several thudding noises that sounded like he was at least trying to get undressed. Dan ignored him, carefully extracting a bottle of lube and a condom, making a mental note to have a clear-out of this drawer at some point. There were several loose AA batteries rattling around, a Tesco voucher, and an umbrella, none of which belonged in this drawer. 

“Come over here,” he said, sitting on the edge of the bed to undo his jeans. 

“Make me.” Phil was just out of sight, hidden by the bed. 

Dan sighed, shucking off the rest of his clothes, then crawled across so he could see over the end of the bed, to where Phil was lying on the floor, now nude. 

“I’m not carrying you,” he said, his eyes flicking lazily over Phil’s body. 

“No, you have to,” Phil said, giving him a pleading look. “Dan, I’ve-” he started laughing “-I’ve fallen and I can’t get up.” His laugh was infectious - Dan couldn’t stop himself from cackling, even as he rolled his eyes. 

“Oh, shut up,” he said, even as he rolled off the bed to kneel next to Phil again. “You’re the worst.” 

Smoothly, he lifted Phil off the ground, cradling him against his chest. For a tall man, Phil wasn’t particularly heavy, and Dan, although by no means an especially strong person, could lift him pretty easily. Phil let out a little satisfied noise, nuzzling Dan’s shoulder affectionately. Dan sighed, dropping Phil onto the bed. Phil squawked, his limbs flailing as he bounced against the mattress. 

“Shut up, you’re fine,” Dan said, reaching past him for the lube and condom. 

Phil pouted, letting his knees flop to the side. Dan had to pause for a moment and just look at him. He let his hand wander to his own cock as his eyes wandered over Phil’s body, slowly stroking himself until he was hard enough to slip the condom on. While he was doing that, he chucked the bottle of lube at Phil (who dropped it). Phil looked like he was going to argue for a moment, but he just pushed his bottom lip out, squeezing a glob of lube onto his finger and reaching down to prepare himself. 

“Ready?” Dan asked, biting his lip as he lifted his gaze to meet Phil’s. Phil’s breath hitched for a moment, and he nodded. Dan shuffled across the bed without any semblance of grace, kneeling between his open legs to line himself up. He paused, glancing up to check on Phil, then slowly slid inside him, giving him time to adjust. Phil moaned, his head tilting back, as Dan settled into position, his knees under Phil’s thighs and his hands gently gripping his hips. 

“Ready?” Dan asked again. 

“So fucking ready,” Phil said, his hips twitching against Dan’s grip. 

Dan started moving, slowly at first, matching his rhythm to the response it got out of Phil. He was doing nothing to help, leaving all the work to Dan. His cock was bouncing against his stomach, untouched but starting to leak, and Dan slowed his thrusts, bringing one hand across to wrap around it. 

“Oh, Dan, I’m-” Phil moaned, one hand gripping the bedding. “Don’t, I’m gonna-”

Dan moved deliberately, his hand matching his hips, making Phil gasp and writhe until he came, spilling over Dan’s hand and his belly. Dan kept the movements going for a moment, then slipped out of Phil, his hand moving to his own cock. He rolled the condom off, dropping it to one side. Gripping Phil’s knee loosely with one hand, he jerked himself off, his eyes lingering on Phil’s lips, until he came as well. Satisfied, he let himself flop onto the bed next to Phil, their legs tangling together. 

“Ugh,” Phil said, surveying the mess on his stomach. “Did you have to?”

Dan just nodded, pressing a kiss to his temple. “It’s what you deserve,” he said. 

**Author's Note:**

> i've had a bit of a Time with life stuff and writer's block recently so i decided to hold off on my wips to write something self indulgent... which i then ALSO got blocked on. anyway, i hope it was fun! it was gonna be kinkier but i guess i can't help being soft.


End file.
